National News
“Young People Get So Easily Offended These Days,” Says Boomer Offended By Grace Tame
OFF POINT: A Sydney boomer has taken exception with Grace Tame's National Press Club address yesterday. "Honestly I'm getting so sick of this girl," Paul Partridge shouted at his TV. "She's not Australian of The Year anymore. It's time she...
PM Phones Jenny, After Being Asked About The Price Of Bread On Who Wants To Be A Millionaire
LIFELINE: The Prime Minister has once again called upon his wife Jenny for help. Appearing on the Nine Network's game show Who Wants To Be A Millionaire, Scott Morrison was faced with the tricky question: 'How much does a loaf...
PM Has Photo Taken With Ash Barty Immediately After Her Big Win, To Ensure She’s Still Smiling
PHOTO OPPORTUNITY: Australia's Prime Minister has leapt into action tonight, moments after Ash Barty won the Australian Open. Scott Morrison asked the 25 year old for a photo, as she made her way into the players' change rooms at Rod...
New Photo Captures The Moment Grace Tame Was Told The PM Shat Himself At Engadine Maccas
FULL STORY: A DBT photographer has captured the moment Grace Tame found out about an unsavory 1997 incident involving Scott Morrison. "Don't shake his hand," an onlooker warned Grace Tame as she approached the PM today. "He accidentally shat his...
#BREAKING: Scott Morrison Remains Completely Unaware He’s Hated By Grace Tame
NOT TAME: A photo has captured a tense moment with the Prime Minister and 2021 Australian of the Year Grace Tame. The 27-year-old advocate for survivors of sexual assault completely barred Scott Morrison with some heavy daggar eyes at The...
#BREAKING: The UN Announces W.A’s Separation From Australia, To Form Its Own Sovereign Nation
INDEPENDENCE DAY: The United Nations has today formally recognised Western Australia as an independent nation, as the state's tough border closures are extended. From next month Western Australia will be officially called the Independent Republic of Western Australia (IRWA), with...
W.A Premier Reveals He Was Bullied At High School, “And Now It’s Payback Time”
FULL STORY: An emotional Western Australia Premier has shared some poignant insights from his childhood, as he fronted the media today. Mark McGowan has revealed he was the victim of schoolyard bullying back in the 1980's. "Life wasn't easy for...
New polling shows more Australians want Scott Morrison deported than Novak Djokovic
DBT YEAR IN REVIEW: JAN, 12 SLIM MARGIN: A new survey shows slightly more Australians would like to see the back of the PM than the world no. 1 tennis player. Polling company Newspoll interviewed a random sample of 5,600...
Afghan Asylum Seeker At Villawood Detention Centre Starts Practicing Tennis
LONG SHOT: Afghan asylum seeker Karima Zahir has been locked up in immigration detention for three years waiting for his asylum claim to be processed. But the 31 year old says he's finally seen a potential way out. "It's a...
Generic Chat About Covid With Colleague On First Day Back At Work Enters 50th Minute
COVID BANTER: Despite spending most of their break stressing about covid-19, two office workers have again found themselves deeply entrenched in a conversation about the pandemic. "So how was your Christmas break, did you get covid? hahah," one worker asked...
