National News
PM Reveals Plan To Set Up Federal ICAC, Once 95% Of The Population Is Fully Vaccinated
DELAYING TACTIC: The Prime Minister has this morning made his first significant commitment to the development of a federal anti-corruption body. But there's a catch. "We need you to do your bit first," says Scott Morrison. "We'll establish a national...
ICAC Launches New Inquiry To Find An Australian Politician Who Is Not Corrupt
The Independent Commission Against Corruption has begun a new inquiry aimed at finding a state or federal politician who is not corrupt. "We think there's a chance there might be one or two out there," says ICAC Chief Commissioner Peter...
QLD Premier Slowly Realising That Being A Power Tripping Bully Doesn’t Necessarily Stop Covid
The Queensland Premier is reportedly trying to come to terms with the harsh reality that draconian border closures and a bad attitude won't necessarily stop Covid. "Damn, I was pretty sure that locking up the state and tearing families apart...
New Freedom: Qantas To Allow Unvaccinated Travellers On Flights, But Only In The Cargo Hold
CARGO CLASS: Qantas has unveiled a major new freedom for unvaccinated Australians. From next Monday they'll be able to board domestic flights, alongside luggage in the cargo hold. "We are being inclusive of all Australians," says Qantas boss Alan Joyce....
QLD Premier To Reopen Border With NSW After Matching With A Sydney Man On Tinder
Travel between NSW and Queensland is back on the cards after Anastasia Palaszczuk announced the reopening of the border as soon as the NSW lockdown comes to an end. "My decision today will give vaccinated NSW residents plenty of time...
Melbourne Tradie Claims Earthquake Was A ‘Hoax’ Aimed At Forcing Protestors Off The Streets
FAKE QUAKE: A Melbourne scaffolding worker has labelled yesterday's 5.8 magnitude earthquake a "geo conspiracy." "The Victorian government planted explosives in a few parts of the city to make it seem like there was an earthquake." says Joe Nalane. "It...
Melbourne Plummets Down Rankings Of ‘World’s Most Liveable Cities’
Melbourne regularly features in the annual top ten 'world's most liveable cities,' but the events of the last few months have triggered a rapid slide. "Melbourne has unfortunately dropped to the 187th most liveable city for 2012," says Dan Brasich...
Victorian Government Now Offering Pfizer In Powder Form To Encourage Tradies To Get Vaccinated
FULL STORY: The Victorian government is taking drastic action to help prevent construction workers protesting mandatory covid vaccinations. "We've been working with drug manufacturer Pfizer to make the vaccine available in powder form," says Premier Dan Andrews. "Tradies appear more...
Melbourne Hairdresser Spotted Buying Hi-Vis Vest From $2 Shop To Take Part In Tradie Protest
FrEEdumB FiGhTEr: Appearances can be deceiving. Just asked Melbourne hairdresser Lyle Gray. Today the 31 year old salon worker was spotted buying a hi-vis vest from his local $2 shop so he could pose as a construction worker. "I'm on...
Christian Porter Teams Up With Andrew Laming To Form ‘White Males United’ Party
NEW DIRECTION: Christian Porter and Andrew Laming have announced a bold new plan to revive their political careers. They've formed a new independent party called White Males United. (WMU) "We're confident about attracting strong voter support from white Australian males,"...
