National News
Unexpected cooler weather gives local finance bro perfect excuse to whip out the puffer vest
VESTED INTEREST: A local finance worker was seen walking around Double Bay in a Moncler puffer vest today, even though it's only March. "Even after a heatwave on Sunday this bloke already has the puffer on, what a muppet," shouted...
Kmart now only stocking Australian made products, in protest of US trade tariffs
HOME GROWN: It might look like the result of yet another round of panic buying, but this is a bold act of patriotic defiance. Kmart has today removed all overseas made products from its shelves. The retailer says it's now...
#BREAKING: Tropical Cyclone Alfred downgraded to a mainstream news media clickbait conspiracy
MEDIA STORM: In a twist even the most dramatic weather forecasters didn’t see coming, Tropical Cyclone Alfred has been downgraded to a mainstream news media clickbait conspiracy. After days of frenzied warnings and frantic panic buying, it turns out Alfred...
Growing concerns for Gold Coast woman refusing to evacuate until she finishes watching last night’s episode of MAFS
STAYING PUT: Emergency service workers are applying heavy pressure on a Gold Coast woman to evacuate her home, as Cyclone Alfred fast approaches the east coast. But Margaret Plymouth says she's only prepared to leave after she finishes watching last...
#BREAKING: Triple M announce new breakfast radio hosts for 2025: Marty Sheargold and Andrew Tate
SHOCK JOCKS: Triple M says its set to become dominant in breakfast radio after announcing a bizarre new on-air pairing. From next week Marty Sheargold and the notoriously controversial Andrew Tate will host a new breakfast show called 'One For...
First 24 hours of weekend away with friends at AirBnB spent arguing about who should get which room
WEEKEND WARRIORS: It was meant to be a chance to relax and unwind, but a weekend away for one group of Sydney friends quickly turned into a petty and tension-filled ordeal. Almost half of their time at a Bowral AirBnB...
“Sorry, I didn’t see your text,” insists friend who checks his phone every 5 seconds
BAD CONNECTION: A local man is accused of neglecting his friends after failing to reply to text messages, despite being glued to his phone 24/7. Investment analyst Mark Stanforth admits to leading a busy life and being overloaded with messages,...
#BREAKING: Trump announces plan to take control of Bondi Junction outdoor mall
TRUMP MALL: Sydney residents have been shocked by the U.S President's controversial new plan to take control of the aging Bondi Junction outdoor mall. "We will completely level the entire area and start again," says Donald Trump. "I don't believe...
Men on MAFS somehow yet to understand they need to rank their partner 1st in the photo challenge, regardless of how hot they are
"It's not an honesty challenge, it's an IQ challenge," says expert John Aiken. PHOTO CHALLENGED: Men on MAFS are still struggling to comprehend a fundamental rule of the show's photo task, in which the cast are asked to rank other...
Bondi man holidaying in Byron Bay, complaining about how many Bondi people are at Byron right now
TOO CLOSE TO HOME: A Bondi man says his holiday to tourist hot spot Byron Bay is being overrun by 'absolute blow-ins' from Bondi. "I'm so sick of all these muppets," says Craig Hawke. "There are yoga instructors, digital nomads,...
