Analysis
Local real estate agent still flaunting BMW umbrella, 30 mins after it stopped raining: Report
BRANDING EXERCISE: A recent run of sunny and dry weather in Sydney has given local real estate agent Mark Arnold few chances to use his heavily branded BMW umbrella. That's why he was making the most of today's light showers,...
#BREAKING: PM announces public holiday to help all Australians recover from Matildas’ loss
THERAPY DAY: The Prime Minister has just announced a new public holiday to allow Australians a chance to recuperate from the Matildas heart-wrenching semi-final loss. "This is a crucial step for the nation's collective well-being," says Anthony Albanese. Slated for...
Divorcee CEO demanding return to office, purely so he can sleaze onto the executive assistants
UP CLOSE & PERSONAL: A recently divorced CEO has issued a company-wide mandate for a complete return to the office, despite the ongoing success of remote work. "We all crave face to face interaction," Mike Wright told staff during an...
LinkedIn introduces new ‘Calm down you tosser’ reaction button
REALISTIC REACTIONS: Social networking website LinkedIn is being praised for adding a new reaction button to give users a broader choice beyond 'Like,' 'Comment' or 'Share.' In an effort to address the growing number of self-congratulatory and boastful posts on...
DEAFENING SILENCE: Local man runs out of conversation three years into marriage: Report
ON MUTE: A flourishing & vibrant emotional connection between a Sydney man and his wife has reportedly come to a disappointing end after three years of marriage. "We used to talk so much. About our hopes, dreams, fears and funny...
#BREAKING: Local man using his wife’s $200 a bottle shampoo to wash his ball sack
HEAD & BOULDERS: The cost of living crisis has just become even more serious for one Sydney family. Last night Greg Noble liberally applied his wife's $200 a bottle L'Oreal Kerastase hair elixir to wash his nether regions. "I'm not...
Man’s ‘throwback’ Insta post from Mykonos 2015, outperforming posts by his friends currently in Mykonos
WAY BACK WHEN: A local man has had a surprisingly warm reception to his 'Throwback Thursday' Instagram post. Seizing on the opportunity of today being Thursday, 35 year old Mark Taverner shared a photo of himself in Mykonos from eight...
‘Business coach’ recording selfie video while driving, too busy to film it at any other time
DRIVING FORCE: A self-described Melbourne 'business coach' is using a camera mounted to his dashboard to film selfie videos while driving, in a desperate bid to seem busy. "I just thought I'd jump on here quickly," Peter Marlah says at...
Regular MDMA & cocaine user with severe head cold refusing to take Codral
HARD PILL TO SWALLOW: After a few weeks of heavy partying, Linley Marsh has tried almost everything to help cure her severe flu. She's testing negative for Covid, but has been bed-ridden for the last week. And despite being unable...
Man suffers panic attack after showing photo on phone to mum, who began swiping to other photos
He took back the phone quickly and paramedics are on the scene. ONE FOUL SWIPE: Paramedics rushed to a home in Sydney's inner west today after a man suffered a mild panic attack when he briefly gave his phone to...
