
August 16, 2023
THERAPY DAY: The Prime Minister has just announced a new public holiday to allow Australians a chance to recuperate from the Matildas heart-wrenching semi-final loss.
“This is a crucial step for the nation’s collective well-being,” says Anthony Albanese.
Slated for Friday, the day is being coined: The National Matildas Recovery Day.
Supermarkets are already anticipating a surge in demand for comfort foods.
“We are ramping up supplies of Tim Tams and ice cream,” says a spokesperson for Coles.
Alcohol retailers are also prepped for increased sales.
As the nation prepares for a day of healing, one thing is clear: the Matildas may have lost a match, but they’ve firmly won the hearts of all Australians.