Analysis
PM Reveals Australia’s Confronting New Covid Advert Was Directed By Stephen King
FEAR FACTOR: Legendary horror writer Stephen King was the brains behind the federal government's confronting new TV advertisement warning about the dangers of Covid-19. The 30 second clip shows a terrified young woman struggling to breath on a ventilator. "Obviously...
Western Sydney Warning: Wearing Adidas Tracksuits Does Not Count As Doing Essential Exercise
The NSW Premier has issued a stern warning to residents of Western Sydney, as the city's Covid outbreak grows. "Leaving home in an Adidas tracksuit without any plans to do any actual exercise is a breach of public health orders,"...
Beauty & Cosmetic Clinic Closures Forcing More People To Wear Face Masks: Report
New research shows a dramatic rise in the number of people wearing face masks is not linked to fears about Coronavirus. "It's due to the ongoing closures of cosmetic and beauty clinics," says Lin Harmen from consumer group Choice. "People...
Man Who Loves Working From Home Pretending To Be Sad About Extended Lockdown
A local sales executive is flexing his acting skills today, pretending to be upset about the extended lockdown set to be announced by the NSW Premier. "I'm really missing all of you guys," Ben Hutton told colleagues on this morning's...
Major Supermarkets Join Forces To Launch ‘Toilet Paper Near Me’ App
Supermarket shoppers have been given a new weapon in the fight for toilet paper. A new app called 'Toilet Paper Near Me' allows consumers to easily see which supermarkets currently have toilet paper in stock. "As panic buying continues in...
Eastern Suburbs Residents Panic Buying Activewear In Preparation For Lockdown
Activewear retailers are reporting a sales spike in Sydney's east, as residents prepare for the week-long lockdown taking effect at midnight. Queues are building up around several activewear stores today, as shoppers rush to buy what's become the lockdown clothing...
NSW Government Now Using Powerball Machine To Determine Daily Covid Numbers
The Covid-19 new daily infection rate is the all important number we rely on to help track our success in the fight against the killer virus. But amid increasing uncertainty and confusion over how the numbers are gathered, the state...
Local Introvert Praying For Full Lockdown As Perfect Excuse To Avoid Social Activity
As Sydney's Covid outbreak continues to grow, there are calls for the city to be placed into a full lockdown. "The current social distancing restrictions don't go far enough," says local introvert Peter Kremer. "I'm very keen to go back...
Donald Trump Announces Tilt At Australian Politics After Hearing Barnaby Joyce Got Re-elected
Former US President Donald Trump has announced a plan to revive his political career down under. It comes after hearing that the basket case of Australian politics Barnaby Joyce has been re-elected as Deputy PM. "You know what, maybe there's...
Narcissistic Nutter Confirms Dire State Of Australian Politics After Re-election As Deputy PM
One of Australia's biggest loose cannons has been re-elected Deputy Prime Minister today. Barnaby Joyce's controversy-filled political career revolves around doing as many media interviews as possible. And just when Australian voters thought they'd seen the end of the drunken...
