Analysis

Beauty & Cosmetic Clinic Closures Forcing More People To Wear Face Masks: Report

New research shows a dramatic rise in the number of people wearing face masks is not linked to fears about Coronavirus. "It's due to the ongoing closures of cosmetic and beauty clinics," says Lin Harmen from consumer group Choice. "People...
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Man Who Loves Working From Home Pretending To Be Sad About Extended Lockdown

A local sales executive is flexing his acting skills today, pretending to be upset about the extended lockdown set to be announced by the NSW Premier. "I'm really missing all of you guys," Ben Hutton told colleagues on this morning's...
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Major Supermarkets Join Forces To Launch ‘Toilet Paper Near Me’ App

Supermarket shoppers have been given a new weapon in the fight for toilet paper. A new app called 'Toilet Paper Near Me' allows consumers to easily see which supermarkets currently have toilet paper in stock. "As panic buying continues in...
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Eastern Suburbs Residents Panic Buying Activewear In Preparation For Lockdown

Activewear retailers are reporting a sales spike in Sydney's east, as residents prepare for the week-long lockdown taking effect at midnight. Queues are building up around several activewear stores today, as shoppers rush to buy what's become the lockdown clothing...
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NSW Government Now Using Powerball Machine To Determine Daily Covid Numbers

The Covid-19 new daily infection rate is the all important number we rely on to help track our success in the fight against the killer virus. But amid increasing uncertainty and confusion over how the numbers are gathered, the state...
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Local Introvert Praying For Full Lockdown As Perfect Excuse To Avoid Social Activity

As Sydney's Covid outbreak continues to grow, there are calls for the city to be placed into a full lockdown. "The current social distancing restrictions don't go far enough," says local introvert Peter Kremer. "I'm very keen to go back...
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Donald Trump Announces Tilt At Australian Politics After Hearing Barnaby Joyce Got Re-elected

Former US President Donald Trump has announced a plan to revive his political career down under. It comes after hearing that the basket case of Australian politics Barnaby Joyce has been re-elected as Deputy PM. "You know what, maybe there's...
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Narcissistic Nutter Confirms Dire State Of Australian Politics After Re-election As Deputy PM

One of Australia's biggest loose cannons has been re-elected Deputy Prime Minister today. Barnaby Joyce's controversy-filled political career revolves around doing as many media interviews as possible. And just when Australian voters thought they'd seen the end of the drunken...
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‘Sorry, I’ve Been Too Busy To Reply To Your Text,’ Says Woman After Her 3rd Hour Scrolling Instagram

A Perth woman is letting her friend down gently today, after it took her an entire afternoon to reply to his text message, asking how she's going. Claire Temple's reply to Peter Marr's message eventually came at 5pm yesterday, more...
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Close Friend Not Replying To Texts, But Very Active In Group Chat

Local woman Gina Marsh (pictured on the right) says she's messaged her good friend three times in the last two weeks, without any reply. It comes as her friend remains very active in a WatsApp group chat with seven others....
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