Analysis

Uber Launches New Dating App For Single Drivers and Passengers

Ride share company Uber is diversifying into the lucrative dating industry. Uber has launched a new app called Uber Single, exclusively for single drivers and passengers. "It's very similar to regular Uber, but for single people only," says Uber's CEO...
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Man Wearing ‘Thrills’ T-shirt Probably Just Going To Chill At Home Tonight

Appearances can be deceiving. A Sydney man wearing a 'Thrills' branded t-shirt on a beautiful Saturday in the height of summer is probably just going to chill at home tonight. "I've got some paperwork to catch up on," says local...
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Local Biker Angry Nobody Watched Him Ride Loudly Down Darlinghurst Rd

A dejected Sydney motorbike rider is criticising pedestrians around Kings Cross today. When Marc Hendricks rode his excessively loud motor bike down Darlinghurst road this afternoon, he says not one person looked at him. "It's unbelievable," he says. "What else...
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No Name Aussie Politician Rides Bandwagon By Congratulating The US Democrats On Twitter

Greens leader Adam Bandt has joined the thousands of politicians around the world offering their congratulations to the US Democrats on their inauguration. "The swearing in of the Biden administration represents a triumph of hope over fear. Congratulations @KamalaHarris and...
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Melbourne Man Stuck O/S Starts Intensive Tennis Lessons To Qualify For Next Year’s Australian Open

A Melbourne born man whose been stranded in London since March has hired the coach of British tennis star Andy Murray, in a desperate bid to qualify for the 2022 Australian Open. "It could be my only way into Australia,"...
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Local Angry White Boomer Offended By Coon Cheese Rebrand

A local Anglo Saxon baby boomer is today expressing his disgust over the rebrand of a cheese he's never eaten. It remains unclear exactly how Harry McCormack could get so riled up about the name change, but he's spent a...
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‘Banning Trump Is Censorship,’ Says Government Which Tried Stopping ABC Reporting War Crimes

The Federal government is attacking Twitter over censorship claims, despite Canberra's draconian move last year to censor the ABC from reporting war crimes by Australian soldiers. "Generally speaking, I'm not a fan of censorship, but it's OK when the Federal...
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Investigators Combing TV Footage Reveal Pauline Hanson Among Alleged Cricket Racists

NSW Police combing through footage of yesterday's SCG crowd have revealed One Nation Leader Pauline Hanson among a group of alleged drunk racists. "Ms Hanson can be seen attempting to hide behind a face mask," says Inspector Warren Leachy. "We...
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It’s Easier To Wander Into The US Congress Than To Get Into The Sheaf On A Wednesday Night: Report

Researchers investigating today's brutal riots in Washington D.C have concluded that security is tighter at The Golden Sheaf Hotel in Double Bay on a Wednesday night. "This is a big wake up call for security working to protect US politicians,"...
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Sydney Teen With Bad Acne Grateful For New Mandatory Face Mask Ruling

The New South Wales Premier's announcement today of mandatory face masks in shops and public transport comes as a big relief to one young Sydney man. Nineteen year old Tom Ridley suffers with bad facial acne and says his quality...
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