Analysis

NEW PHOTOS: Labor Leader Visits The Golden Sheaf Hotel After Buying A White Linen Shirt

MEET & GREET: The opposition leader is tonight at the Golden Sheaf Hotel in Sydney's east, as he attempts to shore up votes ahead of the federal election. "Normally I drink at more dingy pubs in the inner west, but...
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Opposition Leader Discovers Fashion Sense Just In Time For The Election

VOTE OF APPROVAL: With a federal election fast approaching, the leader of the Labor party leader has staged a dramatic physical transformation. In a photoshoot for the Australian Women's Weekly, Anthony Albanese has unveiled his new look, including tight chinos,...
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Local Boomers Who Purchased Home in 1981 Can’t Understand Why Son Is Still Renting

PRICE HIKE: A Rose Bay woman is accusing her adult son of being ‘lazy’ and ‘unsuccessful,’ because he can’t afford to buy a home in Sydney's east yet. “My husband and I had no trouble affording property when we were...
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People Who Write ‘U’ Instead Of ‘You’ Save 8 Minutes A Year: Report

SHORT CUT: It may seem like a minimal change, but writing 'u' instead of 'you' could save you big-time. Well, 8 minutes every year to be exact. That's the finding of a new report by the Time Management Association. It...
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“Young People Get So Easily Offended These Days,” Says Boomer Offended By Grace Tame

OFF POINT: A Sydney boomer has taken exception with Grace Tame's National Press Club address yesterday. "Honestly I'm getting so sick of this girl," Paul Partridge shouted at his TV. "She's not Australian of The Year anymore. It's time she...
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Reporter Peter Van Onselen Now Offering Masterclass On ‘Attention Seeking For Journalists’

HEADLINE MAGNET: High profile Australian political reporter Peter van Onselen has signed up with US online education platform MasterClass. The TEN Network political editor and columnist at The Australian features in a new 15-minute MasterClass video tutorial offering tips for...
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Local Woman Sacks Her Personal Trainer After Discovering He Doesn’t Have A Sleeve Tattoo

GETTING PERSONAL: A Sydney woman is on the hunt for a new personal trainer today after her first ever PT session yesterday left her feeling dissatisfied. "He seemed like a decent trainer and everything," says Nancy Wright. "I got a...
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Local Woman Finally Agrees To Have Sex With Husband After He Brought Home A 5 Pack Of RATs

DROUGHT BREAKER: A Melbourne man is counting his lucky stars tonight. Damien Burke this afternoon somehow managed to find a 5-pack of rapid antigen tests, leading his wife of seven years to promise him sex tonight. "It's been a while,"...
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Relief, As Staff Shortages Allow Diners To Talk Without Being Interrupted By Waiters Every 10 seconds

EAT IN PEACE: As staff shortages cripple large parts of the Australian economy, it's providing a rare reprieve for one industry. A new report shows restaurant patronage has increased 14% compared to pre-covid times, as diners enjoy eating and chatting...
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“We Can’t Hand Out Rapid Tests For Free,” Says PM Who Handed Out $89 Billion In JobKeeper

FULL STORY: The Prime Minister is continuing to resist pressure to provide rapid antigen tests for free, even as state testing regimes buckle. "I understand some people will get sick and possibly even die, and that's a shame, but at...
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