Local News
Northern Beaches Man Panic Buying Weed In Preparation For Lockdown
An Avalon man is busy texting multiple marijuana dealers in and around Sydney's Northern Beaches today, in a desperate bid to secure a personal supply for lockdown. "I've messaged about 6 local dealers this morning," says Bryce Porter. "So far...
Trump Hires Private Investigator To Find Out What His Friends Are Doing On NYE
With only two weeks until the end of the year, Donald Trump's New Years Eve plans remain unclear. "I haven't been invited anywhere," the outgoing US President admitted to DBT. "I asked my friend Mitch McConnell what he's doing, but...
NSW Premier Declines Invite To Family Christmas Lunch To Avoid Questions About Her Love Life
The NSW Premier will be spending Christmas day alone, after declining an invite from her mother to attend the annual Berejiklian Christmas lunch. "The Armenians are pretty hectic when it comes to probing personal questions," says Gladys Berejiklian. "I just...
#BREAKING: Woman Who Replied ‘Maybe’ To FB Event Invite, Actually Shows Up
More than 20 people have been left stunned this afternoon when one of their friends arrived at a BBQ. Isabelle Fisher had RSVP'd as a 'Maybe' on the event's Facebook page. "I'm so glad I could make it," she shouted...
Innovative Man Posts Screen Shot Of Weather App To Instagram
Instagram followers of Joe Terrone won’t need to check their weather apps today. The 26 year old has taken the ingenious step of sharing a weather app screen shot to Instagram. “I just thought it would be a useful thing...
#BREAKING: Pete Evans Spotted Working At Boost Juice In Byron Bay
It's a fall from grace like no other. Pete Evans was a celebrity chef and diet advocate inspiring millions of people around the world. Now he's been photographed putting in a shift at Boost Juice in Byron Bay. "It's just...
Belle Gibson To Replace Pete Evans On ‘I’m A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here!’
Network TEN has announced convicted scammer Belle Gibson will be joining the cast of 'I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here!' "She's a perfect replacement for Pete Evans," says Network TEN spokesman Doug Piggott. "They're both advocates of all...
Pip Edwards Requests Artist Add Instagram Filter To Archibald Entry
A young Melbourne artist has been left heartbroken after being asked to add an instagram filter to her Archibald Prize entry. The portrait's subject Pip Edwards made the request, saying the artwork made her look "too old." "It's such a...
Pill Testing Allowed & Drug Dogs Scrapped, Under NSW Premier’s Plan To Repair Her Reputation
The NSW Premier has announced the withdrawal of her government's strict drug policies, as she attempts to win back voter support. "We are scrapping sniffer dogs and allowing pill testing, effective early next month in time for summer," says Gladys...
Nation Relieved To Hear Gladys Berejiklian Is Getting Some Action
Supporters of Gladys Berejiklian say she's "done nothing wrong" after her shock admission to having a close personal relationship with disgraced former MP Daryl Maguire. "It's a hard world for single people past a certain age," says political commentator Jene...
