Local News

Local woman begins painful recovery from 4-Day Easter bender

FIRST STEPS: The last four days have taken a huge toll on 24 year old Amy Shannon. She's begun her long and painful recovery from 100 consecutive hours of treating her body like an amusement park. "So far Amy is...
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#BREAKING: ICAC Launches Fresh Inquiry Into What Gladys Ever Saw In Daryl Maguire

HOT MESS: ICAC has today announced a new investigation into the relationship between the former NSW Premier Gladys Berejiklian and disgraced former Liberal MP Daryl Maguire. "We suspect something else was happening which has yet to be investigated, because he...
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#BREAKING: Cafe Worker Removes Sandwich From Toaster Without Being Reminded By Customer

A Sydney cafe worker is being praised for showing unprecedented initiative while working today. Matt Nagle remembered to remove a toasted sandwich from the toaster without being prompted by the customer. “I was feeling particularly on point today,” says the...
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NSW Premier Unveils Mental Health Support For Those Trying To Fit Into Jeans After Lockdown

TIGHT SQEEZE: Mental health experts say there's growing anxiety and uncertainty being felt by those who are trying to wear jeans for the first time since the end of lockdown. "I've been wearing nothing but pyjamas and activewear for the...
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Man Who’s ‘Too Scared Of Covid’ To Return To The Office, Has Been Out Partying Every Night This Week

COVID EXCUSE: As many Sydney workers begin returning to their offices, others are trying to continue working from home. Finance worker Carl Roberts has told his boss he's 'worried about covid and would like to keep working remotely.' But separately...
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New Report Shows It’s Now Harder To Get Into Kmart, Than Into The Sheaf On A Wednesday Night

RETAIL FRENZY: Sydney boomers are being blamed for long delays at the popular discount retailer Kmart. “Older shoppers are having a tough time navigating QR codes and vaccine passports,” says Irene Tomlinson from consumer group Choice. "It's a difficult and...
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WORRYING TREND: NSW Records Alarming Daily Increase In The Number Of Gym Selfies

NEW OUTBREAK: One day after gyms re-opened in NSW experts are already warning about a concerning new outbreak of gym selfies posted to social media. "We were worried this might happen," NSW Premier Dominic Perrottet told reporters today. "Please exercise...
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FREEDOM DAY: Punchbowl Man In Red Ferrari Currently Doing Laps Of Double Bay

VROOM VROOM: Double Bay's streets have roared back to life today, with hundreds of expensive sports cars returning to the harbour side suburb after lockdown. "How good is Freedom Day!?" said one Ferrari driver from Punchbowl in Sydney's west. "I...
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Traffic, Crowds & Bad Weather: Calls For ‘Freedom Day’ To Be Renamed ‘Punishment Day’

PUNISHMENT DAY: Residents of Greater Sydney have woken to a shocking new report, showing that Freedom Day is the worst possible day to go out. "Traffic gridlock has immediately surpassed pre-lockdown levels, as every single person heads out at the...
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“I’m Dying For A Beer At The Pub Today,” Says Man Who’s Been Drunk At Home For The Last 4 Months

THIRSTY WORK: A Sydney man who's spent 95% of lockdown drinking at home says he can't wait to go to the pub today for a Freedom Day beer. "That very first sip is going to taste so good," says Mark...
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