PUNISHMENT DAY: Residents of Greater Sydney have woken to a shocking new report, showing that Freedom Day is the worst possible day to go out.
“Traffic gridlock has immediately surpassed pre-lockdown levels, as every single person heads out at the same time,” says Matt Henley from consumer group Choice.
“It’s like the Boxing Day sales out there today.”
As Sydney suddenly emerges from four months of lockdown, the city is back under heavy strain, as locals go back to work, the shops, the gym, or the pub.
“This is not what I call freedom,” says one man who has been stuck in a Bondi Junction car park for the last two hours.
“All I wanted to do was meet a few mates for a beer, but it would have been way more fun and convenient if we just caught up on a Zoom call.”
Choice is advising as many people as possible to stay home for the next few days.
“And we calling on the state government to change the name of ‘Freedom Day’ to ‘Punishment Day,’ says Matt Henley.
“It’s a much more accurate name.”