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#BREAKING: Gladys Berejiklian’s Ex-Boyfriend Announced As New CEO Of Australia Post

The career of former disgraced politician Daryl Maguire has received a major lifeline today, after being announced as the new CEO of Australia Post. "I'm focused on continuing the transformation and modernisation journey that Australia Post has been on over...
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#BREAKING: China’s President Refers To Covid-19 As “The White House Virus”

China's President has wished Donald Trump and his wife Melania "a speedy recovery" after they were diagnosed with Covid-19. But Xi JinPing has also used his address on Chinese state TV to criticise the White house. "The White House Virus...
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Trump Calls Pete Evans, Urging Him To Get Tested For Corona

The US President has called Australian celebrity chef Pete Evans, urging him to get tested for Covid-19. "Get a test ASAP Pete," Donald Trump told Evans while on the phone in the Oval Office. "I thought Corona was bullshit too,...
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Melania Demands Trump Stay 1.5M From Her At All Times, As They Both Test Positive For Covid

The US President Donald Trump and his wife have gone into quarantine after they both tested positive for Coronavirus a short time ago. The White House has announced strict quarantine laws will apply, and Melania Trump is enforcing some tough...
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Andrews Unveils Mental Health Plan For Victorians Trying To Fit Into Their Jeans After Lockdown

As Victorians prepare for a further easing of lockdown restrictions, increasing numbers of Australian's face the very real prospect of wearing jeans again. "I've been wearing nothing but pyjamas and activewear for the last three months," says local woman Rachel...
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#BREAKING: Peter Dutton Nominated For 2021 Nobel Peace Prize

Australia's Minister for Home Affairs Peter Dutton has been nominated for the 2021 Nobel Peace Prize for his work promoting peace and harmony within Australia. The nomination was submitted by little known Norwegian right-leaning politician Jonas Claude-Rigge. "Peter Dutton has...
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‘R U OK Day?’ 2020 Cancelled After Organisers Realise That Nobody Is OK

It's the annual day when people are urged to ask 'R U OK?' to help start a conversation that might make a difference in someone's life. R U OK? Day 2020 was scheduled to take place tomorrow, but organisers say...
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Federal Treasurer Applies For JobSeeker Allowance As Nation Enters Recession

The Federal Treasurer has announced that he's applied for the JobSeeker allowance, as Covid-19 continues to deal its most severe economic blow since World War II. "There's no reason why politicians can't apply for the allowance," says Josh Frydenberg. "We're...
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Eddie McGuire Applies For Job Seeker Allowance After Suspension Of Millionaire Hot Seat

Controversial TV host Eddie McGuire has applied for the federal government's Job Seeker allowance of $550 a fortnight. It follows the suspension of the TV show he hosts on Channel Nine The Millionaire Hot Seat. The show is filmed at...
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#BREAKING: Russia’s Coronavirus Vaccine Now Available For Sale Globally On eBay

Russia's groundbreaking coronavirus vaccine is now available on the popular ecommerce platform eBay. "We're working quickly to make the vaccine available to as many people as possible," says Russian President Vladimir Putin. "Together, we can now definitely stop the spread."...
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