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#BREAKING: Hollywood superstar Gwyneth Paltrow and entourage fail to get a table at Totti’s Bondi

TOTTI'S REJECT: Hollywood actress and wellness guru Gwyneth Paltrow was unceremoniously today turned away from Totti's Bondi, a popular Italian eatery on Bondi Road. "Sorry Ms Paltrow, we are booked out till April 14 next year," the door girl said....
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‘CONFUSED & CONCERNED’ Police called to Double Bay as locals spot a ute in the area after 4pm

OVERTIME: There was a rare ute sighting in Double Bay this afternoon at 4.17pm, more than a quarter of an hour after tradie knock-off time. A white Toyota Hilux was spotted on Bay Street, clearly out of place among rows...
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Daniel Andrews’ North Face jacket collection to go on display at the Melbourne Museum

ADVENTURE MAN: The former Victorian Premier has announced that his coveted North Face jacket collection will be going on display at the prestigious Melbourne Museum. "I'm sharing my North Face jacket collection with the people of Victoria," Daniel Andrews said,...
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#BREAKING: Dan Andrews steps down, after getting new job as spokesman for North Face puffer jackets

NEW ADVENTURE: Victorian Premier Daniel Andrews has fronted the media in a snap press conference to announce the next "exciting phase" of his career. "A short time ago I accepted a job offer as the official spokesman for North Face puffer...
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#BREAKING: Severe parking shortage at Balmoral Beach forces angry driver to take drastic action

BEACHFRONT PARKING: A Sydney driver has taken bold and drastic action today amid a severe and ongoing shortage of parking options at Balmoral Beach. Peta McKenny-Drake told DBT that she'd been driving around Balmoral, Mosman and other surrounding areas for...
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Woman who saved 25c by remembering to bring her re-usable bag to Woolies, rewards herself with a $5k bag from Christian Dior

SUPERMARKET SAVINGS: A Double Bay woman was flaunting her new Christian Dior tote bag this afternoon. She purchased it after some quick thinking while getting ready to go to the supermarket. “Instead of buying a new recyclable bag like I...
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‘THE BAY BOYS’ Police warning of a ‘Bra Boys’ style gang now operating in Double Bay

ESHAY BAH: Double Bay's tranquil streets are being threatened by a new gang dubbed 'The Bay Boys,' who appear to be based on Maroubra's infamous 'Bra Boys'. "The Bay Boys are flourishing in and around Double Bay," says Chief Inspector...
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Albo reveals real reason Joyce is leaving Qantas early: “I have appointed him federal transport minister”

SPIRIT OF AUSTRALIA: The PM has today announced an unexpected cabinet reshuffle, with Qantas CEO Alan Joyce to step into the coveted role of federal transport minister. "Who better understands the complexities of Australian transport than someone who has been...
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REPORT: Local woman wishes her sugar daddy a ‘Happy Father’s Day’

WHO'S YOUR DADDY: In a cheeky twist to Father's Day, a 28 year old local woman has extended her well-wishes for a 'Happy Father's Day' to her 54 year old sugar daddy. "Ever since we met, you've been an excellent...
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#EXCLUSIVE: Qantas’ strict no pets in cabin policy relaxed exclusively for Albo and his dog

SPIRIT OF AUSTRALIA: In a groundbreaking and controversial move, Qantas has relaxed its longstanding no-pet in cabin policy for Australia's PM and his beloved canine Toto. "We believe in a fair go for all," says Qantas CEO Alan Joyce, "Well,...
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