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Local 6’5″ finance bro with trust fund now wearing blue contact lenses to broaden his reach with the ladies

BLUE STEEL: In a bid to fully embrace the "I'm looking for a guy in finance, trust fund, 6'5, blue eyes" meme, local finance worker Nathan Joseph has suddenly started wearing blue contact lenses. The 34 year old, known for...
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“Hydration & clean living are the key to my youthful skin,” claims Bondi woman who spends 25k a year on cosmetic injections

AU NATURALE: A youthful looking Bondi woman has today made the stunning claim that her flawless complexion is the result of nothing more than a strict clean eating regime and drinking plenty of water. Vanessa Ticehurst, 44, regularly shares her...
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Local couples therapist now offering special deal: For an extra $200, he’ll say who is correct

MONEY TALKS: A Sydney therapist is offering a brave new approach to couples counselling. Psychologist James Marshall is bypassing the traditional technique of staying neutral, and being supportive of both people in the relationship. "I'm turning conventional techniques on their...
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Sydney family of four who can’t afford their power bills forced to spend evenings at Vivid

LET THERE BE LIGHT: In a twist of irony befitting the times, a Sydney family grappling with exorbitant power bills has found an illuminating solution: spending their evenings at Vivid Sydney. The Hoggart's recently found themselves facing an impossible choice:...
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Eastern suburbs coke enthusiast says $300 federal budget rebate doesn’t quite go far enough

BUDGET BLUES: In a startling display of financial frivolity, a Potts Point man is voicing his dissatisfaction with the federal government's $300 budget rebate, saying it simply doesn't stretch far enough to support his lifestyle. "It's a real slap in...
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Local mother of three celebrates Mother’s Day alone in a dark hotel room with a valium

SOLO RETREAT: A busy Sydney mum is taking a unique approach to celebrating Mother's Day this year - giving herself a much needed day off from her family. Cynthia Waters has checked into Double Bay's InterContinental hotel for a day...
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Merivale unveil new Totti’s wood-fired puffy bread flavoured vape

SMOKE AND MIRRORS: Merivale says it's aiming to offer the taste of Totti's famous puffy bread to everyone, even those who are unable to get a reservation at the popular restaurant chain. "Here at Merivale we're all about inclusion," says...
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Man who still hasn’t slept or eaten in 24 hours, announces full recovery from Mardi Gras after having a multivitamin

SLIM DUSTY: A local man has staged a dramatic recovery from 24 hour hours non-stop partying. Sean Bates' Mardi Gras celebrations kicked off yesterday afternoon and ended 30 minutes ago after returning home from the Beresford after party. "I had...
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#BREAKING: Man at local run club accused of being there for the wrong reasons

BAD INTENTIONS: A popular Sydney run club has been rocked by allegations that one its members, Vinnie Silvani, is not there to find love. "Vinnie is always just running and then leaving," said one member, "It's like he's not even...
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#BREAKING: Taylor Swift loses her voice ahead of Australian tour, after too much screaming at the Super Bowl

I'M THE PROBLEM: Australian Taylor Swift fans are tonight praying the pop icon regains her voice after her boyfriend's team, the Kansas City Chiefs, won their third Super Bowl. Swift's vocal cords were pushed to their limits as she cheered...
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