Posts Tagged ‘Staying On’
PM Agrees To Compensate Volunteer Firefighters With 10% Discount At Parliament House Canteen
The Prime Minister has sought to address mounting calls for volunteer firefighters to be paid the same as professionals when they’re forced to fight long-running blazes. “We acknowledge the hard work and long hours our volunteers have put in, but quite frankly, we didn’t ask for them to be there,” says Scott Morrison. “They volunteered.” However the PM has signed off on a new “compensation” package, offering volunteer firefighters a 10% discount at the Parliament House canteen. “We want to make life easier for those who have given up their time to fight fires,” says the PM. “We realise they…
Read MoreWoman Who Hasn’t Lived In Australia For 25 Years Chosen As Nation’s Ambassador
Despite living in the UK since the 1990’s, Kylie Minogue has been chosen as the face of Australia’s new $15 million tourism campaign. “If Kylie really did love it down under so much, wouldn’t she live here?” asks one critic of the TV commercial, which features the pop princess in several iconic Australian locations. Kylie Minogue grew up in Melbourne, but after her screen and stage success she moved to London at the end of the last century. She currently lives in a $25 million apartment in the exclusive London suburb of Chelsea. “Ideally we wanted someone local to star…
Read More#BREAKING: PM To Go For A “Quick Scuba Dive” Before Cutting His Hawaii Trip Short
The Prime Minister has announced his return to Australia “as soon as can be arranged,” following the tragic deaths of two volunteer fire fighters overnight. But in a statement released a short time ago, Scott Morrison says he and his family will be going for “a quick scuba dive” before cutting his Hawaii trip short. “I promised the children we would go for at least one scuba dive while in Hawaii,” he says. “My hands are tied on this issue unfortunately.” The PM will return to Australia amid growing public criticism surrounding his decision to take leave during a worsening…
Read MoreCompany Which Built Sydney’s Light Rail Awarded Contract To Re-Build Sydney Football Stadium
The state government has announced a new contract with Spanish builder Acciona to re-build the Sydney Football Stadium. “Yes, we’ve had our problems with Acciona when they built Sydney’s light rail,” concedes Premier Gladys Berejiklian. “But over that time we’ve built a strong relationship with them.” Delays and cost blow-outs have plagued the light rail project, which continues to wreak havoc on local businesses, traffic, and inner-city residents. It’s understood the state government couldn’t find any other builders willing to re-build the Sydney Football Stadium. “Acciona and the state government hope to have the new football stadium operational in time…
Read MoreLord Mayor Calls For Sydney’s Light Rail To Be Scrapped And Replaced With A Bike Lane
After its offical opening last week, the Lord Mayor has already conceded that Sydney’s light rail project has been a “complete and utter failure.” “The state government needs to be honest with itself and the people of Sydney,” says Clover Moore. “This tram experiment has been nothing but an expensive disaster.” In an attempt to appease frustrated commuters, the Lord Mayor has proposed converting the light rail line into a large, dual direction bike lane. “The infrastructure is already there, all we need to do is fill in the tram tracks and paint the surface green,” she says. “This is…
Read MoreGreens MP Calls For Drug Amnesty Bins To Be Placed At The Entry To Federal Parliament
The Australian Greens political party is calling for drug amnesty bins to be rolled out at the main entry to Federal Parliament House in Canberra. It follows the announcement yesterday that amnesty bins will be introduced at NSW music festivals to reduce the number of drug-related deaths. “Our federal politicians are also at risk,” says Greens MP Phil Meagher. “We believe they should also have the option of throwing out their drugs before they start work.” Phil Meagher claims that illicit drug use is rife within Parliament House, across all sides of the political spectrum. The Prime Minister Scott Morrison…
Read More#BREAKING: PM Denies Links Between The Bushfires And The Sydney Smoke Haze
Already under severe pressure from the bushfire crisis, the Prime Minister is attempting to deflect mounting pressure from Sydney’s lingering smoke haze. In an interview this morning, Scott Morrison claimed the bushfires and the smoke haze are not “necessarily linked.” “It’s too early to link these two weather patterns,” the PM told DBT. “There’s still no credible scientific evidence to say they are related.” Scott Morrison says the hazardous air quality in Sydney can be blamed on several other potential factors. “We know pollution levels sometimes spike, as do fog levels. These two factors may now be combining to form…
Read MoreScott Morrison’s Visit To Rural Fire Service Centre Cut Short As Air Conditioning Breaks Down
Scott Morrison has braved sweltering conditions at the Hawkesbury RFS control centre, as he thanked the state’s firefighters. The centre’s air conditioning system broke down just minutes into the PM’s visit. “It’s getting very hot in here,” he told the firefighters. “I’m going to take a short break but I’ll try to come back shortly.” It’s understood Morrison then took refuge in a nearby McDonalds outlet for 30 minutes, before returning to the centre after the air conditioning was repaired. “I want to thank all the firefighters for their incredibly brave work in difficult conditions,” Morrison continued. “There is still…
Read MoreGeorge Pell Requests Temporary Prison Release To Attend Carols By Candlelight
Convicted paedophile George Pell has requested he be temporarily released from a Melbourne prison so he can attend Carols By Candlelight on December 21. “It’s a very important time of the year and Carols By Candlelight is an event which is extremely close to my heart,” Pell told DBT. The disgraced cardinal says he should be allowed to attend the event given all the work he’s done for the Catholic church. “Christmas is a time for forgiveness. And, I’m only asking to be released from prison for the one night.” Pell’s lawyers say they may be able to convince the…
Read MoreIsrael Folau To Donate Full Amount Of Legal Settlement To Father’s Church
Sacked Wallabies player Israel Folau says he’ll be donating the full value of his legal settlement with Rugby Australia to his father’s church. “I’m giving back to the Lord.” Folau told reporters today. “I’ll be putting a cheque on the collection plate at dad’s church this Sunday.” Falou’s father, Eni, runs the Kenthurst Uniting Church in Sydney’s Hills District. “I’m so proud of you Israel for following your faith,” says Eni. “You lost your job, which isn’t ideal, but giving the payout as a donation to my church gives us a solid tax break.” Israel Folau is being compensated by…
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