Posts Tagged ‘Already Run’
Man ‘so humbled’ to win an award at work, he wrote a 200 word LinkedIn post about it
CIRCLE JERK: A Sydney insurance salesman has posted a photo on LinkedIn of himself winning an award at work, alongside 250 words about how good he is. Paul Barouche beat six other colleagues in his department for the ‘Best client experience’ award. “I’m so humbled to win this award,” he wrote. “Thanks to all my team for their support,” he wrote, trying to give the impression that he may be a manager, despite being an entry level worker. It’s understood the post was only liked and commented on by people who thought Barouche might one day help them find a…
Read MoreSydney mum puts Scots College sticker on her car, despite all her children attending Darlinghurst Public School
MANIFESTING: A Paddington mother is taking dramatic steps to create the false impression that her children are being privately educated. Caroline Hartley-West has quietly applied a Scots College sticker to her car, but DBT’s investigative unit has found that all three of her sons attend Darlinghurst Public. “Just because my children currently attend a public school doesn’t mean I don’t identify with the Scots community,” she told DBT. “When I was younger some of my cousins went to Scots.” Ms Hartley-West admits she’s never actually visited the Bellevue Hill campus herself, but insists she drives past it “all the time.”…
Read More“It’s just so nice to get out of Sydney for a bit,” says eastern suburbs woman staying at friend’s place in Glebe
DISCONNECT: Rose Bay resident Sarah Tallow is describing her weekend getaway to Glebe as “exactly the escape from city life” she needed, despite the Inner West suburb being located only 2 kilometres from the CBD. Ms Tallow arrived at her friend’s terrace on Saturday morning after what she described as “quite the journey” through the city. “It only took me 40 minutes to drive here!” she said while relaxing at her friends place on Glebe Point Road. The 28 year old PR executive admitted to DBT she’s feeling a bit nervous about her night away. “Some of the phone service…
Read MoreEastern suburbs relationship break up scandal: “You never told me you went to a public school!”
DARK PAST: A seemingly idyllic eastern suburbs couple has spectacularly imploded after a shocking revelation rocked their relationship; he went to a public school. “I feel so betrayed,” Melinda Evans told DBT. “We’ve been dating for months already and he never told me about his government funded education.” The boyfriend Pat Michaels had reportedly been keeping his dark past a secret, wearing R.M. Williams boots, and regularly going to the Golden Sheaf and Oak. But the charade was up when she found his Vaucluse High yearbook from 2004. “My school was located in a prestigious coastal area!” he said, in…
Read MoreFully grown adult still somehow completely unaware you’re meant to let people out of the lift before getting in
OBLIVIOUS: A Sydney man has baffled onlookers after charging confidently into a lift before allowing passengers to exit, despite being estimated to be at least 65 years old. At Westfield Bondi Junction this morning, witnesses say the man stepped into the lift, while two people were about to get out. “There was no hesitation. No shame. Just a smile and forward momentum,” said one of the other lift passengers. “When I was five years old I already knew to let passengers off the lift first!” When approached for comment, the man seemed genuinely puzzled. “I don’t see what the big…
Read MoreLocal divorcee seeking attractive, fit and wealthy woman who doesn’t have children, and will drive his children to and from school and sport
TALL ORDER: A Sydney divorcee has today expressed confusion over why his Hinge dating profile isn’t generating the response he expected. Brad Hutchison, 48, told DBT he’s been “pretty flexible” with his requirements, and is open to someone aged between 25 and 30. “It’s a pretty wide age range,” said the father of two, while trying to discipline his children at his Randwick rental. “I don’t think I’m asking for much. But obviously she needs to be good with kids,” he clarified. “School drop-off is 8:15am, pick-up is 3:10pm, and then there’s Saturday soccer, Sunday swimming, and Tuesday night netball.”…
Read MoreBondi woman in hot water after telling friends she has a booking at Totti’s, when it was actually for Totti’s Rozelle
MISINFORMATION: In a scandal that’s rocking Bondi’s tight-knit social scene, local woman Kate Stamer is being accused of misleading and deceptive conduct. The charge? Telling six of her friends she managed to snag a coveted table at Totti’s, when the reservation was actually for Totti’s Rozelle. “As if we’d ever go to Rozelle, I’ve never even heard of it.” “Um, that’s a pretty fucking big detail to omit!” one of her friends told DBT. Luckily for all of Kate Stamer’s friends who were invited, the deception was discovered before they left home for their girls brunch yesterday. In their group…
Read More“It’s so good to be out here in nature,” says eastern suburbs woman during a short stint in the beer garden at Club Rose Bay
WILDERNESS: A Darling Point woman is rediscovering the joys of nature in the beer garden at the newly opened Merivale venue, Club Rose Bay “It’s so nice to be outside among the plants and trees,” said Maggie Tunstall to her friend in between frequent sips of champagne. “It’s so good for the soul.” But their bold foray into the wild was not without challenges. A light coastal breeze forced the 27 year old PR executive into several attempts at lighting her cigarette, but she eventually did so, all while maintaining balance in her designer stilettos. The pair then pledged to…
Read MoreDouble Bay woman being treated for PTSD after driving so far out west she even saw a Red Rooster
UNCHARTED TERRITORY: Sydney PR executive Sally Bell is in therapy after venturing so far west she actually spotted a Red Rooster fast food outlet at Summer Hill. The Double Bay resident says she took a wrong turn out of the Cross City Tunnel, and then got lost near Leichhardt yesterday. While there, she caught a glimpse of the archaic looking chicken shop. “OMG, what the hell is that?” Ms Bell exclaimed. “Is that Western Sydney’s version of Chargrill Charlie’s?” Now she’s been treated for PTSD caused by being so far out into the western suburbs. Her sessions include exposure to…
Read MoreRaising your hand to thank drivers for stopping at pedestrian crossings reduces the chance of them running you over by 18%: Report
SAFETY WAVE: Drivers are legally required to stop for pedestrians at crossings, but a new report shows thanking them can reduce the chance of a hit and run by 82%. “The data is clear,” says Max Sebel of Road Safety Australia. “It’s just a little friendly acknowledgement from the pedestrian, just to make sure they don’t become another statistic.” The five-year study tracked over 50,000 pedestrian crossings in major metropolitan areas. “Even if the car has already come to a complete stop, we recommend offering at least a small wave to all drivers as you walk over a crossing,” says…
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