Posts by DBT
Burned out executive takes sick day so he can stay home and catch up on work
UNDER THE PUMP: The end of the year is fast approaching, but local man Paul Barbosa still has so much work to do. “The only way I get anything done these days is when I’m working remotely from home,” he told DBT. “Otherwise I just get bogged down with generic chit chat with colleagues and pushy requests to do other people’s work for them.” The overworked financial services professional has already had his one day of remote work this week, so today he’s taken a sick day to stay home and finish an urgent report. The eyebrow-raising move has again…
Read MoreSydney man now basing his friend choices entirely on who has a boat
FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS: A local man is staging a dramatic overhaul of his friend groups in a desperate bid to increase the amount of time he spends on boats. David Hensley always dreamed of being a boat owner, but he’s been forced to settle for the next best thing: friends who are boat owners. “The cost of living crisis is taking a toll,” admits the Rose Bay man. “But summer is here so why settle for the beach when you can have a day at sea?” The 31 year old has begun only spending time with people he’d normally avoid.…
Read More“It’s so good to be out in nature,” says woman in park while on a ciggie break during lunch at Catalina
WILDLIFE: A Potts Point woman has rediscovered the joys of nature by stepping outside a swanky restaurant for a five-minute cigarette break in the park. Maggie Tunstall was joined by her friend Max at Lyne Park Rose Bay, near where they were having Friday lunch at the upmarket seafood restaurant Catalina. “Nature is so beautiful, it’s so good for the soul,” she said as she took in the sights and sounds of the park between puffs on her cigarette. But their daring expedition was not without challenges. A gentle breeze forced her to make several attempts at lighting her cigarette,…
Read MoreBondi hipster born into vast generational wealth, mistaken as a homeless man
FASHION FAUX PAS: In a classic case of mistaken identity, multi-millionaire Bondi hipster Chris McMillan was mistaken as a homeless man by a well-intentioned overseas visitor. “I just want to help out someone less fortunate than myself,” said the tourist, as he dropped a 20 cent coin at McMillan’s feet. “I hope this helps.” The tourist remained completely oblivious to the fact that McMillan is the heir to a substantial family fortune that could easily rival the GDP of a small country. “I only wear these bohemian style thrift-shop clothes to try to fit in with all the struggling artists…
Read MoreAdelaide singles now using Ancestry.com as a dating app: Report
INCESTRY.COM: A new report by Relationships Australia has found growing numbers of Adelaide singles are using Ancestry.com as their preferred matchmaking platform. “With a limited dating pool in Adelaide, many people have exhausted traditional dating apps like Tinder and Bumble,” says researcher Michael Clearway. “They’re turning to more unconventional approaches to finding love.” Adelaide man Ed Waller found his girlfriend on Ancestry.com last month. “We’ve got so much in common,” he told DBT. “We’re actually third cousins, so we share a deeper connection than most couples.” Reproductive experts are urging caution over the trend, which is yet to spread to…
Read MoreWaverley Council installs mirrors on the Bondi to Bronte path, so walkers can check how they’re looking
TIME FOR REFLECTION: The Bondi to Bronte coastal walk in Sydney’s east is well-known as a great place to be seen, now the local council is ensuring walkers can also see themselves. “After much community consultation, we’re pleased to complete the installation of more than 80 full-length mirrors on the 4 kilometre stretch of picturesque coastline,” says Waverley Mayor Rob Draper. The move has left fitness enthusiasts rejoicing. “It’s great because I bump into so many people I know on the path,” says Bondi to Bronte regular Hannah Tunks-Marello. “Before the mirrors, I used to get really insecure about bad…
Read MoreCranbrook school asks student who grew up in Bondi Junction to give speech at assembly about adversity
RAGS TO RICHES: A student at a prestigious private school in Sydney’s eastern suburbs has shared his remarkable story of transformation, against all odds. Year 11 Cranbrook student, Dane Oliver-Gordon gave a speech at school assembly yesterday about his traumatic childhood in Bondi Junction. “Life was very different for me back then,” he said. “For starters I used to go to Waverley College, and my parents were forced to cook dinner every night as we didn’t even have a private chef!” The 17 year old didn’t hold back when sharing his confronting story, detailing how his childhood home had no…
Read MoreSydney man buys tickets to see Seinfeld in Perth so he doesn’t have to deal with the traffic leaving Olympic Park
SEINFELD HACK: An eastern suburbs man is taking the unprecedented step of flying to the other side of the country, just to avoid the gridlock traffic whenever there’s an event on at Sydney Olympic Park. Paul Watts has purchased tickets for his girlfriend and himself to see Seinfeld’s stand up comedy show at Perth’s RAC Arena, even though the same show is on in Sydney at Qudos Bank Arena, only 20 kilometres from his home in Dover Heights. “Last time I went to a concert at Olympic Park, it finished at 10pm, but heavy gridlock traffic meant I only got…
Read More“Work hard, play hard,” says unemployed man on luxurious Maldives holiday, paid for entirely by his parents
LIVING LARGE: A Sydney man staying in a lavish water villa in the Maldives has been posting a raft of envy-inducing photos and videos with the #WorkHardPlayHard hashtag. “It’s so good to finally have a chance to wind down,” Marcus Tanner-Wright wrote to his 313 followers. However after a tip off from a DBT reader, we can reveal the 33 year old’s Maldives escape comes courtesy of his mum and dad who are there with him. “He hasn’t had a job in the last 4 years,” says an anonymous source. “The whole #WorkHardPlayHard hashtag is a bit rich given he’s…
Read MoreMother away on holidays sends lengthy text message with no interesting or useful information
GENERIC TEXT: A local mother holidaying in Surfers Paradise has sent her son a 52 word text message without including any interesting or useful information. “I had some spare time while waiting in the hotel lobby, so I thought I’d let Henry know we are safe and well,” Paddington’s Carol Kirwan told DBT. “But I’m not great at texting.” It took her more than 30 minutes to write and send the text, which mentioned the weather and some issues she and her husband were experiencing with hotel maintenance. DBT understands that her 29 year old son barely even read the…
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