Posts Tagged ‘Sport’
Sydney man who’s never played contact sport & once pulled a hamstring getting out of an Uber now referring to NSW Blues as “we”
ARMCHAIR ATHLETE: A Dover Heights man who has never played contact sport at any level and required physio after exiting a Toyota Camry in 2019 is taking partial credit for the NSW Blues’ State of Origin victory. “We just wanted it more,” Max Radovski told DBT. “The boys really responded after I yelled ‘hold the line’ at the TV.” The 34 year old accountant was overheard discussing the team’s strategy, injuries, and future prospects as if he had somehow personally contributed to it. “I’m so proud of the boys, we really put in a massive shift last night. How good is…
Read More“Oh well, there’s always next year!” says Paddington man who only started supporting the Swans yesterday
DIE-HARD FAN: A Paddington man is putting on a brave face tonight after the Sydney Swans’ loss to the Brisbane Lions in the AFL Grand Final. Peter Anderson was among hundreds of other bandwagon Swans fans watching the game at the Light Brigade Hotel on Oxford Street. “Oh well, there’s always next year!” he kept saying, even though today’s match was the very first AFL game he’s ever watched. The 32 year old finance worker was overheard making broad statements about “the Swans’ history of finals appearances,” despite not knowing who Buddy Franklin is. “You can’t win them all,” he…
Read More“It’s coming home!” sings pommy bloke who’s been living in Bondi for the last 31 years & hasn’t been ‘home’ once
FAIR-WEATHER FAN: A Bondi man has spent a large part of this morning loudly proclaiming “It’s coming home!” despite not having set foot in the UK for over three decades. Born in Manchester, Nigel Tanner has lived in Bondi for the last 31 years, and he’s never returned home even once. His sudden interest in the English soccer team comes after it beat the Netherlands in the European Championship this morning. “I’ve been singing ‘It’s coming home’ since 6am today,” he told DBT. “It’s been so much fun annoying all my neighbours and colleagues!” But friends of the 37 year…
Read More“Yes, we won!” shouts former private school boy who used to bash anyone who played soccer
CHANGE OF HEART: The 1998 captain of the Scots College 1st XV Rugby team is today jumping on the soccer bandwagon after the Socceroos World Cup victory against Denmark. “How good are the Socceroos!?” shouted Miles McKenzie, in the early hours of this morning as he watched the game that saw Australia book a place in the round of 16. “I can’t believe we beat Denmark. I’m so proud of our boys.” But it was a very different story back in his toxic private school boy days when rugby ruled, and when he’d verbally and physically abuse anyone who played…
Read More