#BREAKING: Nine Network announce plan to relaunch ‘A Current Affair’ as ‘A Karen Affair’

KAREN AFFAIRS: Channel Nine has announced a major shake-up of its flagship daily current affairs program A Current Affair.

From next week, ACA will be known as AKA, or ‘A Karen Affair.’

“Our show is popular among white, entitled, middle aged women who complain to retail staff a lot,” says Nine’s head of programming Rick Myer.

The only casualty is the show’s current host Allison Langdon.

She’s being replaced by local discount coupon enthusiast Karen O’Neill.

“Even though Ali Langdon is idolised by all Karens, we really wanted an actual Karen to front the new show,” says Rick Myer.

The show’s editorial direction is expected to focus solely on the issues affecting white, Volvo driving women, aged 40 – 60 who live in three bedroom homes in the suburbs.

“We think of them as the kind of people who have ‘live, laugh, love’ wooden plaques in their living rooms,” says Rick Myer.

“It’s a growing market and we want to lock it down.”

The first episode of ‘A Karen Affair’ is scheduled for next Wednesday.