Man desperate to avoid small talk returns to work today holding sign to prevent generic questions about his holidays

CONVERSATION STOPPER: A local marketing executive is going to extreme lengths to stave off generic questions about how he spent his summer holidays.

“I desperately want to avoid repeating the same things over and over,” says Steven Hockney, who ironically works in a field that’s all about communication.

“In fact I don’t want to talk at all.”

On his first day back at work today, the 29 year old is holding a sign which he shows to anyone who asks about his holidays.

It reads: “Good thanks. I just stayed in Sydney and relaxed.”

Steven Hockney told DBT the truth is that his two weeks off were a blur of Tinder dates and heavy partying.

“But seriously, I have no energy to tell people about it,” he says.

“And I’m equally disinterested to hear about how they spent their time off.”

So far he says the sign is working well.

“When my colleagues read it, they laugh and happily walk away.”

“We’re all tired, we’re all broke, and we’d all rather stare at our screens pretending to work.”