InstaFit: Fitness First now offering discount memberships to those only using their phones

PHONE PLAN: As recession fears continue to bite, global gym chain Fitness First is offering relief to Australian household budgets.

“Our research shows up to 14% of our members come to the gym and are on their phones pretty much the whole time,” says Fitness First CEO Joel Mathers.

“So we’re offering am membership discount to those people, provided they don’t use any of our machines, weights or classes.”

From next week Fitness First will begin offering its ‘InstaFit’ phone plan for $18 a week, a $7 discount on its regular fee of $25 per week.

The plan offers unlimited access to the gym’s Wi-Fi and charging stations, while restricting access to actual gym equipment.

“We also have personal trainers on hand to help with selfies and Instagram captions,” says Joel Mathers.

“This discount will definitely come in handy for me,” one woman told DBT. “I only go to the gym so I can post selfies from there.”

“Personally I only go to the gym to perve on women,” says one man. “I just sit next to the cardio area and I use my phone to pretend to be on important business calls.”