Man who relies on work for social activity, relieved his colleagues are being forced back into the office

WORKMATES: A Sydney man with no friends outside of his job is celebrating his employer’s return to the office policy.
“Finally, someone to talk to face to face!” says Geoff Tanner, whose social life consists entirely of forced small talk with colleagues and awkward office parties.
The impact of Covid on the 33 year old’s social life has been much greater than for the average person.
His contact with people during lockdowns was limited to work-related Zoom calls.
But now his employer has announced that all staff must work at least 3 days per week in the office.
“Actually I’ll be doing all my five days in the office,” Tanner told DBT. “That way I’ll be able to make sure I get quality time with everyone.”
As his colleagues reluctantly adjust for the return to office politics and rush hour traffic, Geoff Tanner is already rehearsing witty remarks to make in the office.
“And who knows, maybe one day I’ll be able to convince someone to join me for a drink after work.”