“Buy the dip,” suggests eastern suburbs trust fund recipient who still lives at home with his parents

HIGH ROLLER: An eastern suburbs trust fund recipient was dishing out unsolicited financial advice over lunch today with friends.

As global markets fell on fears of a tariff war, Fabian Lollingsworth told friends to “buy the dip.”

The 32-year-old, whose own investment strategy currently involves zero rent, free wi-fi, and a fully stocked fridge courtesy of his parents.

“This is prime buying territory,” the former private school boy explained.

“Fortunes are made during downturns.”

Friends who joined him at the table were reportedly less enthusiastic.

“He hasn’t paid for his own brunch in years,” one of them told DBT. “And he’s lecturing us about long-term investment strategies?!”

When asked by DBT reporters if Lollingsworth planned to follow his own advice and actually invest his money in the falling market, he hesitated:

“Well, not right now, my accountant (dad) says I should hold onto cash.”