POWER PLAY: U.S president unveils plan to build a Trump Tower in the Strait of Hormuz

STRAIGHT TALK: The U.S President has announced his latest plan to assert dominance in the Strait of Hormuz.

After declaring that the U.S will be “taking over” the key shipping lane, Donald Trump has just released plans for an 80-storey tower in the middle of it.

“Every room will have ocean views,” the president told reporters. “It’s about time somebody developed this strait properly.”

According to glossy promotional brochures, the development would include luxury apartments, a casino, three golf simulators and a rooftop helipad for “very important peace negotiations.”

Maritime law experts are raising questions about jurisdiction, structural feasibility, and the strait being one of earth’s most heavily trafficked and geopolitically sensitive waterways.

“But Iran is going to love it.” says Trump. “Frankly, I think the Ayatollah might buy the penthouse once he sees the spa.”