Posts by DBT
Andrews Unveils Mental Health Plan For Victorians Trying To Fit Into Their Jeans After Lockdown
As Victorians prepare for a further easing of lockdown restrictions, increasing numbers of Australian’s face the very real prospect of wearing jeans again. “I’ve been wearing nothing but pyjamas and activewear for the last three months,” says local woman Rachel Varcoe. “But I tried on my jeans this afternoon and they didn’t fit. Not even close.” And she’s not alone. Mental health experts say the post lockdown torment of attempting to wear jeans again is causing significant anxiety and uncertainty. “That’s why the Victorian government is committing $4.4 million dollars to telehealth and counselling services for those trying on their…
Read MoreDomestic Tourism To Byron Bay Plunges After Zac Efron Gets Girlfriend
Byron Bay’s tourism industry is bracing for the worst, after Zac Efron announced he’s no longer single. Efron went public last week on his relationship with local waitress Vanessa Valladares. “Immediately people started cancelling their trips to Byron Bay and hotel occupancy rates plunged to just 20%,” says Greg Staggard from the local Chamber of Commerce. Byron Bay’s tourism industry is also feeling the big impact of current interstate and international border closures. “The local industry is basically on its knees,” says Greg Staggard. “And with Zac Efron off the market, we’re noticing a lot of Sydney people are now…
Read MoreByron Bay Film Student Offers Zac Efron Role In Short Film He’s Making At TAFE
Byron Bay’s burgeoning film and television industry could receive a massive boost, after an aspiring local producer approached Zac Efron for a role in an upcoming student film. “I told Zac it could be a good opportunity for him to break into Australia’s film industry,” says Robbie Cantrell, who is in first year film making Byron Bay TAFE. The offer was made yesterday when Robbie Cantrell spotted Zac Efron sitting on a brick wall near Wategos beach. “I’d love to have Zac in my film,” says the 21 year old aspiring film maker. “I always try to use local talent…
Read MoreJohn Barilaro Under Fire For Confiscating His Daughter’s Koala Teddy Bear
After a week he’d rather forget, the NSW Deputy Premier has once again found himself under fire. John Barilaro has admitted to confiscating his young daughter’s Koala teddy bear last night. “After what I’ve just been through this week, the last thing I want to see was a koala teddy bear,” he told journalists today. “I couldn’t stand the sight of it.” It’s understood Barilaro lost his temper at home, confiscating the bear, and ordering his 6 year old daughter to “get a normal fucking teddy bear!” “My daughter has accepted my sincere apology – and after a difficult night…
Read MorePM Announces New JobSeeker Payment For Instagram Influencers
Canberra has today announced a new JobSeeker payment specifically for Instagram influencers. “Covid-19 has taken a big toll on everyone,” says Scott Morrison. “Influencer income has also tried up as advertisers realise that most influencers simply purchase their followers.” From next Thursday, Instagram influencers will be eligible for a $1200 fortnightly payment. “We want to make sure these people don’t become marginalised any further,” says the PM. “The ultimate goal is to assist these people on the road to finding an actual job.” More than 3 million Australian’s are currently living below the poverty line. It’s estimated 14% of them…
Read MoreNRL Star Curtis Scott Wins Right To Carry Taser Gun At All Times As Protection From Police
Canberra Raiders NRL player Curtis Scott has won a landmark legal case, allowing him to carry a taser gun at all times. “I’m very relieved,” the 22 year old said as he left court. “You never know when police will handcuff you, pepper spray you and taser you repeatedly for absolutely no reason.” It follows the release of police bodycam footage showing Scott’s gruesome and unnecessary arrest on Australia Day this year. While asleep under a tree in Moore Park, he was handcuffed, doused with peeper spray and brutally tasered 3 times by police. “I’m actually really scared of power…
Read MoreScott Morrison Sends Text Message To Victorian Premier Asking: ‘R U OK?’
Today is the annual day when all Australian’s are urged to ask ‘R U OK?’ to help start a conversation that might make a difference in someone’s life. And it seems the country’s highest profile politicians are getting on board. The Prime Minister has sent the embattled Victorian Premier Dan Andrews a text message asking: R U OK? “I know Dan has been under a huge amount of pressure lately, so I just wanted to let him know that I’m thinking of him,” says Scott Morrison. It comes amid increasing calls for Dan Andrews to step down as Premier after…
Read More#BREAKING: Peter Dutton Nominated For 2021 Nobel Peace Prize
Australia’s Minister for Home Affairs Peter Dutton has been nominated for the 2021 Nobel Peace Prize for his work promoting peace and harmony within Australia. The nomination was submitted by little known Norwegian right-leaning politician Jonas Claude-Rigge. “Peter Dutton has been instrumental in fostering kindness and goodwill among Australia’s many ethnic groups,” Claude-Rigge told Sky News. “His constructive engagement with Melbourne’s African gangs is to be applauded, as is his work running Australia’s compassionate offshore detention regime.” Claude-Rigge stressed that he’s not actually a fan of Dutton, but says he should also be awarded for his commitment in welcoming attractive…
Read More‘R U OK Day?’ 2020 Cancelled After Organisers Realise That Nobody Is OK
It’s the annual day when people are urged to ask ‘R U OK?’ to help start a conversation that might make a difference in someone’s life. R U OK? Day 2020 was scheduled to take place tomorrow, but organisers say they’ve been forced to cancel this year’s initiative. “With Covid and everything else happening this year, ‘R U OK?’ is actually a pointless question right now,” says organiser Ralph Roche. “We’ve realised that everyone’s answer is the same: ‘No, I’m not OK!’” 2020 has been a torrid year. It began with ferocious bushfires along Australia’s east coast, then devastating floods…
Read MoreAussie Journo Who Fled China’s Harsh Regime, Arrested In Melbourne For Sitting On Park Bench
Two Australian journalists who returned home from China today say they’re now living in fear for their basic human rights. One of them – ABC’s China Correspondent Bill Birtles – was arrested this afternoon in a Melbourne Park for sitting on a bench, in breach of COVID-19 restrictions. “What an absolute joke,” says Birtles. “Right now China is a tame liberal democracy when compared to what’s happening here in Australia.” The pair have returned to Australia because of fears for their safety in the wake of the arrest in China of another Australian journalist, Cheng Lei. But they’ll now have…
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