Posts by DBT
Homeless People Removed From Sydney Streets To Make Way For CEO Winter Sleepout
NSW Police asked homeless people to “move on” last night as ‘CEO Winter Sleepout’ organisers prepared for the event at Balmain’s White Bay Cruise Terminal. The CEO Sleepout is an an annual event where Chief Executives sleep rough for a night to raise money for homelessness. But homeless people in the area were instructed to pack their belongings and relocate to other areas around Sydney. “In the interests of CEO safety, we asked them to move at least two kilometres from where the CEO’s were sleeping last night,” says Senior Constable Ivan Lalic. The controversial move was supported by event…
Read MoreBondi Man Only Visiting Trendy Places In Case He Gets Covid & His Exposure Sites Are Published
As Sydney’s latest Covid outbreak grows, one man is taking extreme measures in case he gets infected and his exposure sites are made public. Bondi’s Dean Platz is now only going to trendy, upmarket venues and shops. “I normally get my morning coffee from McDonalds but obviously that is a big risk,” he says. “So I’m now forcing myself to drive to Indigo in Double Bay.” “It’s a hassle, but it’s totally worth it.” “Also I’m not going to Coles anymore,” he says. “Instead I’m doing all my grocery shopping at Harris Farm. It just sounds a lot cooler.” The…
Read More‘Sorry, I’ve Been Too Busy To Reply To Your Text,’ Says Woman After Her 3rd Hour Scrolling Instagram
A Perth woman is letting her friend down gently today, after it took her an entire afternoon to reply to his text message, asking how she’s going. Claire Temple’s reply to Peter Marr’s message eventually came at 5pm yesterday, more than three hours after he sent it. “Sorry it took me a while to respond,” she eventually texted him back. “It’s been a really crazy day so far.” However Ms Temple has revealed to DBT that she actually did nothing all day, except lose track of time in an Instagram death scroll which lasted three hours. “Well, that, and also…
Read More“Did You Really Shit Your Pants At Engadine Maccas?” The Queen Puts Our PM On The Spot
Queen Elizabeth II began her brief meeting with Australia’s PM on the sidelines of the G7 summit by asking him the toughest question of all. “As Head of The Commonwealth I feel it my duty to ask you something I’m quite concerned about,” said her Majesty. “Is it true you really shat your pants at Engadine Maccas?” A visibly uncomfortable Scott Morrison attempted to diffuse the situation, telling the Queen “it was a long time ago,” without actually answering the question. Insiders say there are people who can prove he did indeed shit his pants in the hours after the…
Read MoreSydney Man Who’s Never Played Contact Sport Now Referring To The NSW Blues As “We”
A Sydney man who only played tennis and chess at school is today referring to the NSW Origin team first as “we.” “We absolutely smashed them last night,” says Jason Dunn, while dressed head to toe in Blues merchandise. “How good is Origin football?” The NSW Blues thrashed Queensland 50-6 in Townsville last night. “What a night!” Dunn says. “I stayed up to watch the whole match on TV and I even watched some of the post match celebrations. Normally I go to bed at 9.30pm!” The 31 year old is among the millions of Australians who know very little…
Read MorePalaszczuk Cancels State Of Origin Series, As Queensland Records New Covid Case
The 2021 State of Origin series has come to an abrupt end, after Queensland recorded a new case of Covid-19. “We’ve been left with no other option but to withdraw from the series,” says the Queensland Premier Annastacia Palaszczuk. It comes after a Melbourne woman, infected with Covid, travelled from Victoria to Queensland by car during lockdown. “Queensland is now on edge, with fears of a new outbreak,” says Ms Palaszczuk. “The last thing we need is players and fans crossing the borders just for a game of football.” Some Queensland Rugby league fans who spoke to DBT admit the…
Read MoreDymocks Donates Its Stock Of Meghan Markle’s Book To Ease Melbourne’s Toilet Paper Shortage
Australian bookseller Dymocks is donating its fast-growing stockpile of Meghan Markle’s new children’s book to help ease Melbourne’s ongoing toilet paper shortage. “We’ve already tried slashing the prices of the book to no avail,” says Dymocks head of retail, Carol Flinders. “Nobody wants it.” The Bench tells the story of the eternal bond between a father and son, witnessed in the eyes of a mother. But it’s being slammed by reviewers who are dismissing it as a ‘vanity project’ which should have been kept within the family. Dymocks is now set to deliver around 200,000 copies of the books to Coles…
Read MoreClose Friend Not Replying To Texts, But Very Active In Group Chat
Local woman Gina Marsh (pictured on the right) says she’s messaged her good friend three times in the last two weeks, without any reply. It comes as her friend remains very active in a WatsApp group chat with seven others. “I’m worried,” says Ms Marsh. “I think maybe she’s barring me.” To find out, the 29 year old has begun investigating. She’s asking others in the group chat if the friend is also not replying to them. “It’s a weird question, I know, but so far all of them say the friend has been super responsive.” Feeling rejected, Ms Marsh…
Read MoreCareer Lifeline: Israel Folau Given Contract At Sydney Convicts Gay Rugby Union Team
Controversial cross code footballer Israel Folau has been handed a much needed career lifeline. The 32 year old has accepted an offer to play with the gay and inclusive Rugby Union team the Sydney Convicts. “It’s not quite like playing for the Wallabies, but the playing standard is much higher than I expected,” says Folau. “And all the Convicts players are really good blokes.” “I thought they’d all hate me, but they’re actually all really nice and tolerant.” The signing comes two years after Folau’s playing contract with the Wallabies was torn up in response to his homophobic Instagram post.…
Read MoreHeartbreak: ‘My High School Crush Added Me On FB, But Turns Out She’s Just A Pyramid Seller’
A local man is telling of the heartbreaking moment he realised his high school crush was only getting in touch to try sell him essential oils. “I hadn’t seen Judy in nine years,” says Brad Farah. “But last week she added me as a friend on Facebook, and for second I thought I was in.” But his elation was short lived, as he accepted the friend request and began perusing her Facebook profile. “It was inundated with posts and photos about Doterra essential oils,” Farah told DBT. “It was literally a pyramid selling shop front.” The 28 year old says…
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