Posts by DBT
Penrith man in yellow Lamborghini currently doing laps of Double Bay
HIGH ROLLER: An overly excited man from Sydney’s west is currently doing laps of Double Bay’s cafe strip in a bright yellow Lamborghini Diablo supercar. “How good is it here?!” says an excited Marco Mattia. “I actually feel very at home here.” The 47 year old is reportedly loudly revving his V12 engine, while busily looking around to see if anyone is checking him out in his car. “It’s actually a bit quieter than expected here at 3pm on Saturday afternoon,” he says. “I might stop for a quick coffee at Indigo then continue doing laps when things get a…
Read More#BREAKING: Bondi woman dumps boyfriend after he moved to Bondi Junction
HEARTBREAK: A local man has been left shocked and confused when he was dumped by his girlfriend today. Sandra Raleigh ended the 18 month relationship after he recently moved to Bondi Junction. “He used to live around the corner from me on Bondi road,” says Sandra Raleigh. “We had a great relationship and I’m definitely going to miss him.” She says the two kilometre distance between Bondi and Bondi Junction is already proving too much. “I won’t date anyone who lives outside of the bubble,” she says. “To be perfectly honest, I also don’t consider Bondi Junction to be part…
Read MoreMan confused as angry wife only wants to vent about her problem, not solve it
LOST IN TRANSLATION: A well intentioned local man has been left bewildered and berated by his wife after he tried to help her this morning. Michael Mackie offered his wife Katrina a potential solution to a problem she was facing at work. “I suggested she talk to her boss about why she didn’t feel equipped to carry out a certain task,” says Michael Mackie. But it’s understood Katrina Mackie reacted angrily. “I didn’t see it coming,” says Michael Mackie. “She had a huge meltdown, telling me she only wanted to talk about the problem, not solve it.” Mr Mackie then…
Read MoreInfluencer forced to develop a personality, as the Threads algorithm shuns her non-stop selfies
FRESH START: A Bondi influencer is embarking on a new content strategy, after her relentless selfie posting fell foul of the Thread algorithm. “I’m pivoting to become a different kind of content creator,” Sally Braggs told DBT. The 23 year old is tipping her toes in the comedy genre, in a bid to adapt to Meta’s new text-based social media platform. ‘So, how is everyone enjoying Threads? hahah. Comment below!’ she wrote in her maiden Threads post. “Obviously I feel much more at home posting sexy selfies, and to be honest that’s what my followers want.” “But also the time…
Read MoreEXPOSED: Influencer’s 100k Instagram following not joining her onto Threads, as most of them are bots
SLOW BURN: A fitness influencer’s migration onto Threads has hit a stumbling block, when it was revealed that most of her 100k Instagram followers are, in fact, bots. After four days on Threads, Belle Bradley has only accumulated 13 followers. “It’s going much slower than expected,” the 30 year old fitness influencer admitted to DBT. “But maybe it’s just a problem with the algorithm or something?” Bradley is remaining relatively quiet on social media, except for a few cryptic posts about ‘weathering the storm.’ “She’s really got egg on her face unfortunately,” says one social media expert. “It confirms that…
Read MoreSydney Fboy partying in Ibiza starter pack: All the essential items
PEAK SEASON: With the European summer travel season now well underway, DBT has produced this handy starter pack for all Fboy’s traveling to the Spanish Island of Ibiza. The number one must-have item is a fruity flavoured vape for regular tokes while off chops clubbing. The vape also serves as a vital tool in luring equally nicotine addicted women desperate for a puff. An impressive array of tattoos is an important part of the style guide, as is an open button shirt for easy display of abdominal muscles. White canvas shoes are the obvious footwear choice to complete the Fboy…
Read MoreNOSE BEERS: Dry July having zero impact on bathroom queues at Sydney pubs & clubs
LONG LINES: Restroom queues at Sydney venues were reportedly as long as usual last night, despite it being the first weekend of Dry July. Pub and club owners say they were anticipating a reduction in toilet queuing, with thousands of Sydney-siders taking part in the alcohol-free fundraiser. “Drink sales are down, but toilet queues remain long,” says Bungalow 8 club manager Ray Harris. “We’re not 100% sure why.” He says he noticed a slight drop off in activity at the urinals in the men’s restroom. “But queues for the cubicles remain. Same goes for the women’s toilets,” says Mr Harris.…
Read MoreMan hides from colleague so he doesn’t have to say hi to him for the 4th time today
TAKE COVER: A Sydney office worker has gone to extreme lengths to avoid having to greet his co-worker for the fourth time in a single day. “He’s a good guy and everything, but it just gets awkward after a few interactions,” says Will Franco, who has already spoken to Mark Thomas 3 times today. “I’ve seen him in the kitchen, at the photocopier and in the corridor, and it’s only 1.30pm,” says Franco. And, now with Mark Thomas walking near Will Franco’s desk, the 31 year old ad account executive has ducked for cover, lying on the floor underneath his desk.…
Read MoreTime spent organising weekend away with friends, longer than actual weekend away: Report
WEEKEND WORRIERS: A new study has shed light on how long it takes to organise a weekend away with friends. The Institute for Social Dynamics found the average attendee spends 52 hours discussing the weekend away on the WhatsApp group chat. “That’s a full 4 hours longer than the standard weekend getaway of 48 hours,” says lead researcher Simone Stevens. The study found disagreements about choosing a date, transport arrangements and accomodation led to significant planning delays. “It’s like conducting a multi-million dollar business deal,” says Ms Stevens. “And quite often the weekend away never even ends up happening.” Double Bay…
Read MoreLocal woman uses friend’s wedding as tasteless excuse to post flattering photo of herself
WEDDING CRASHER: A Sydney woman is being accused of hijacking her friend’s wedding yesterday, purely as an excuse to post flattering photos of herself on instagram. In one photo, Rena Peters strikes a model pose, with the bridal party and bride – appearing blurry in the background. The photo, posted on Instagram this morning, is captioned: ‘You are the most beautiful bride I’ve ever seen, congratulations!! xox Love you to the moon and back.” However the bride Samantha Pogash, says Rena Peters barely even spoke to her all day. “Believe it or not, she never even said congratulations, apart from…
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